TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON
Directed by Michael Bay
Starring Shia LeBeouf, Leonard Nimoy, John Malkovich, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley
Review by Stewart Loud
After the horrific train crash that was Revenge Of The Fallen almost erasing all the good memories I had from the first of Michael Bay's Transformers films with it's truly terrible Jar Jar Binks style comedy characters, vomit inducing gags and an overall story that felt like it was written by someone who didn't give a shit about the Transformers legacy, I wasn't sure if the franchise could be salvaged and reshaped into something I wouldn't be embarrassed to say I've been a massive fan of for 25 years. None the less, the trailers did make it look temptingly epic and as I've been an enormous Transformers fan ever since the original comics and cartoon series in the 80's I was never gonna miss out on watching this in the cinema in all it's 3D glory. So, was it any good?
The short answer to that question is yes. Apart from the special effects being absolutely mind blowing even for a Transformers film, Michael Bay has definitely made a big effort to take things more seriously this time around. The film begins with a brief historical montage of footage from the space race and lunar missions mixed with scenes shot to create a massive conspiracy plot that forms the main premise behind the plot of the film. Maybe not the greatest or most original ideas ever to be used in a science fiction film but it's all very well put together and it does give you the feeling that you're watching a film aimed at entertaining grown ups as well as selling toys.
As you'd expect from the third film in the trilogy, the scale of the threat posed by the Decepticons has really jumped up a notch or two for this one. Not just limited to relatively small engagements that N.E.S.T. And the US government can cover up, this film features all out war between the Humans with their Autobot allies and hordes of invading Decepticons and lets face it, this is what every red blooded Transformers fan wants to see, not Devastator climbing a pyramid as some sort of giant animal with massive bollocks.
Another thing that was nice to see, or hear anyway, was Leonard Nimoy (Galvatron from the original Transformers animated movie in 1985) voicing the character Sentinel Prime. I did get excited when my friend told me Frank Welker (the original Megatron) was voicing Shockwave but he literally says one word throughout the entire film. Almost as if Michael Baye did it to further piss off all the fans -myself included- who thought he would've been far better than Hugo Weaving for the new films.
It's not a short film at all at about two and a half hours but instead of being full of pointless scenes that could have been shortened or cut out all together like the previous film (Sam's mum on space cakes attacking students?) the film is fairly well put together with decent pacing and story progression and just the right amount of intrigue for a film of this sort.
Yes there were a few bits during the hour long climactic uber-destructive tear up between the goodies and the baddies that perhaps were a little over the top or didn't make total sense and no it's not likely to win any oscars for the acting or script and I'm sure there'll be plenty of people who say it's just ridiculous nonsense with no real substance or artistic creativity behind it past the brilliant design of the Transformers themselves but these people would be judging it by the wrong standards. It's a film about giant transforming robots from outer space and as such it delivered pretty much everything I could've hoped for from a film about giant transforming robots from outer space.
Oddly enough, the thing that gave me the most joy from watching this film was the total absence of Mud Flap and Skids, the supposedly comic duo who absolutely ruined every scene they appeared in during the previous film. Also absent were the plethora of ridiculously over complicated and unnecessary gimmicky characters that peppered Revenge Of The Fallen. No Decepticons who transformed into really attractive blond women, no Decepticons made up of thousands of tiny balls that could be as fine as a sheet of paper, no Decepticons with the ability wipe out whole armies with telekinesis or stupid little spidery scientist bots. No, what we get for the films comedy quota -which I accept is necessary for a film aimed at such a wide audience- is the talents of Shia Lebeouf, who despite what a lot of people say, I've always found funny since I first saw him in Even Stevens, some a chuckleworthy performance from John Malkovich and the little radio control car, leg humper guy, Wheelie from the last film plus his new equally small and obnoxious matey whatever his name was. These two aren't on screen all that much though and as a result they didn't end up getting on my nerves. I have to confess to finding a lot of their scenes quite funny.
If you like sci-fi action then you'll love it. If you've got kids and they want you to take them to see this, it's a fair bet you'll enjoy it just as much as they do and most importantly if you like the Transformers (and hated Revenge Of The Fallen!) then you'll definitely love this. A spectacle to behold and popcorn cinema at its very best.
SCORE 8/10
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